Have you been stressed out by your age already? Have you been told that "at your age" it will be difficult to conceive? That you are not getting any younger? That you need to hurry and not miss another month? That your eggs are old? That your aging body won't work well anymore? Do you lose sleep because you feel there is a ticking time bomb in your body ready to go off on you?

Then let's address the big elephant in the room head-on: while the majority of doctors, infertility specialists, media representatives and internet websites are still proclaiming that age is the biggest predictor of your success to become pregnant this is simply not true (anymore).

Medical professionals now see many more couples in their 30s and even 20s who struggle to get pregnant at an age they should be easily conceiving. In fact, Americas fertility rate fell to a record low in 2016. In an analysis issued by the National Center for Health Statistics, researchers report that birthrates declined to record lows in all groups under age 30.

Yet according to the New York Times fertility increased with older women. Especially between the ages of 35 - 39 years women birthed more babies than the previous year and the article noted an even higher increase in birthrate for women in the 40 - 44 age bracket. Just FYI: statistically the success rate for IVF (in vitro fertilization) for women in their early to mid 40s can be as low as 10 percent, so it's doubtful that the increased birthrate is based solely on assisted reproductive technology.  

So why is this view about age and plummeting fertility still so prevalent?

Sure, our bodies age and at some point a woman's reproductive years come to an end but when this time comes is not simply determined by age (menopause was usually something women in their 50s went through, now we see women in their 30s going through it. I just met a friend of a friend last week who was diagnosed being post menopausal at age 37). It's much more nuanced than that. 

If you'd line up all the women and men who experience fertility challenges you would find myriads of reasons as to why they are struggling. And, as any experienced holistic fertility expert will assure you, these reasons are often not just physical, but are also mental, emotional, dietary and lifestyle related. 

So far science has primarily focused on the physical aspects of infertility and put their rigorous studies of symptoms - the study of the diseases and their risks but less their causes - in correlation to the number that these women and men share: the number as shown on their driver's license. 

Age is the one denominator that we all share, regardless of our race, health or lifestyle. Two people may have nothing in common, including their causes of infertility, but still they can share the same birthday/birthyear. 

Over time age has become the "one size fits all" predictor of our fertile future.

As any woman over 35 who walks into a doctor's clinic knows: from now on her fertility is judged by her age and not her health history.   

(And if your doctor and fertility specialist shouldn't be able to figure out why you cannot get pregnant he or she can legitimately blame it on your age. There. I said it out loud.) 

This "one size fits all" age approach has been heavily promoted with attention grabbing headlines by the media (of which I am a member of for 25 years, so I know what I am talking about) and a booming 4-billion-dollar infertility industry that can work "miracles" for many many couples but it also is what it is: a very profitable business. 

And here's the real problem: by now most doctors but also their female patients have come to EXPECT that something is going to go wrong because of their age. 

This attitude and narrow focus is not helpful to any woman of the dreaded "advance maternal age" who is possibly in the prime of her life!

You can be 25 and struggle with infertility. And you can be 45 and firing on all fertility cylinders.

Let's stop making our age our sole fertility predictor and shift the focus to the truth behind the number: